Sometimes we need help with things, but we might have trouble asking for it. This can be due to a number of things, pride, wanting to be self-reliant or fear of rejection. However I believe that if you ask people for help they will often be willing to give it as they may not have realised you needed help or they are just kind like that. Think about it if someone asked you for help you would probably do everything you could to help them.
So here are a few tips to make asking for help go a bit more smoothly.
Recognise that you need help.
If things are getting on top of you, you are find yourself getting stressed or emotional you might need some help. Maybe the thought of doing certain things fills you with dread, you might need other people to step in and take some of the load off your shoulders. They might have some ideas about how you can manage your tasks or help you with a few of them.
Write it down.
Write down what you help with and why. Try to explain to yourself what has gone wrong and what you need. This will help to straighten it out in your mind and this may uncover a different solution.
Easier said than done sometimes. Getting emotional and defensive will prevent you from being understood and may not inspire others to help you. If you are defensive this could stem from a fear of being judged or feeling "weak". Take a few deep breaths, read what you have written down and remember that if the person starts to ask questions they are trying to understand where you are coming from, so be patient. Try and relax, this interaction could be really positive for both parties.
Prepare to compromise.
The other party involved here may not be able to give you everything you need, right now, especially if you are in financial trouble and asking for money. Coming up with a solution that works for both of you and that you can both feel good about, will help you feel better overall.
Pay it forward.
Always show your appreciation to the person helping you and tell them how much this means to you. Try to write a little thank you card to the person. After receiving help always try to leave yourself open to helping others, it will boost your self-esteem and make you feel really good too.
I hope this little guide has helped you out. Share any tips you have for asking for help below.
*I am not a professional these are just some tips I have used myself. If things are getting too much and you feel down for a long time or just need someone to talk to please seek medical help or talk to the Samaritans on:
- 08457 90 90 90 (UK)
- 116 123 (ROI)